Brooke's Visit!

My best friend from high school recently came to stay with us a few days. I was scared Brooke would be shocked out our INCREDIBLY boring life....but of course, she jumped right in and became my sister wife - I'm beginning to think those crazy polygamists are on to something (ew) - but I digress. Baking cupcakes with Treyson, holding a constantly fussy Oakley, or hauling around chubby Reagan....she was a rock star. It was so nice to have company which I, and my kids, adore. I have got to be better about taking pictures though!

Our youngest

Reagan Anna
The past couple weeks have been some of the most difficult in terms of patience and exhaustion. I feel like the past 4 months of no sleep finally hit me like a wall. I saw a picture of myself today and realize now why everyone is asking how I'm doing - I look like hell. I struggle with my guilt as a mom, trying to divide my attention between the kiddos and a little time for myself (and my sanity...). I constantly feel guilty and it's, hands down, the most difficult part of our situation.

Reagan is definently my neglected child. She has a super high maintenance sister who demands to be held or screams bloody murder....hence, Reagan is often left to fend for herself. Trevor pointed out she was balding on the back of her head and I know it's because I don't hold her enough. I feel awful. She has the most tender, sweet deposition. She rarely cries and when she does, it's the most pitiful sound you have ever heard. It just makes you drop everything and run to her rescue (unlike her sister, whose cry pretty much makes you want to drive nails into your eyeballs). As soon as you look at her, and talk to her, her eyes light up and I swear she smiles with her whole being - scrunched up eyes and all.
I've never seen anything like that. She is truly a gem on this Earth and no doubt, sent to our family because she can handle the chaos.

Sneaky

Treyson's favorite pasttime is pulling his laundry basket from his room, to the counters in search of "treats". I either need to stop baking ( might help my waistline too...) or hide things better......

tongues

Reagan and Oakley always seems to have their tongues out, blowing bubbles lately. By the end of the day, they are soaked!

Sleep

It seems everyone is getting good use of our bed BUT Trevor and I.

I thought I would get brave yesterday and run some errands. What a horrible idea - especially in the pouring rain. I about killed a lady who thought it would be a good idea to take the blanket OFF the twins car seats so she could see them, as I was returning a purchase; hence, waking them up. Serious bad words for that rude woman, but she didn't even understand English so they didn't go far.

Treyson's vocabulary has exploded recently. It's hilarious. He will pick up on the most ridiculous things. Ask him to sing the Farmers Insurance commercial... We're so grateful he is more able to express what he wants or needs now. He is also able to express his temper. It's lovely. He would spend 23 hours a day outside and often tries to. He struggles with sleeping now. For some reason, his normal sleeping schedule is complete messed. Who knows....

The girls still sleep a lot and eat a lot. I'm trying hard to enjoy the time with them as mechanical as it often feels. It's frustrating b/c I feel like one is ALWAYS crying (usually Oakley) and one is ALWAYS being neglected. I guess that is just life with twins. They "talk" a lot now and it's pretty hilarious. Oakley is the littler one (only by 5 oz) but has this robust manly voice while Reagan has this tiny little girl voice.

I will say this, the hard moments are HARD - when all three kids are screaming bloody murder, your 20 leftover belly pounds are jiggling and youre not lactating enough......but the good moments? The ones where all three kids are on the couch with you laughing? Those are REALLY good.

It's all about balance I suppose.

The end.

Back to diaper changing...

Sisters

I find myself snapping more and more of these sweet moments.

(now if someone could just teach me how to use my dang camera under nasty lighting at night...)

Have I mentioned I LOVE having girls?